Issue 6: Spring/Summer 2019
Home is where the heart is
For many couples, the prospect of moving into a care home in later life can be emotional after years of married life under one roof.
Fortunately, our RMBI care homes continue to welcome couples who have chosen to make the move into a care home, together.
Our Marketing Manager visited the Prince George Duke of Kent care home in Chislehurst, to meet with 80-year-old Marguerite and 81-year-old Michael and find out how staying together in an RMBI home has helped them to enjoy later life.
Spring has officially sprung and sunlight is streaming in through the windows. In one corner of the room a bookshelf heaves under volumes of the old classics; in another, a giant scrabble board is propped up against the wall.
We met in 1960 at an army dance,” Marguerite begins. “We were married a year later and had one daughter – it’s our 58th anniversary this year. Michael became a Freemason a couple of years later and he went through the chair twice, so I was first lady of the lodge for a while too! We have very fond memories of ladies’ nights and white table evenings.
“When we got older, Michael started to find it hard to walk –”
“I could walk,” Michael interjects with a mischievous twinkle in his eye.
“No, you couldn’t,” Marguerite laughs, then turns back to me. “I looked after him myself for as long as I could, but after seven years it got too much for me. I struggled to get him up and down the stairs and into bed, and in the last year he fell over several times and ended up in hospital. We had carers come in to help for a few months, but in the end we decided he had to move into a care home.”
“As a Freemason, had you heard of our RMBI homes before?” I ask Michael.
“No, I hadn’t,” he says, “but I had supported masonic charity for many years. A friend took me to visit a few different homes, and I liked this one the best so I settled on here.”
“The home was good for Michael and it was a relief to know that he was being properly cared for,” Marguerite agrees. “But without him I struggled. “My mental health deteriorated and I started to find it difficult to move around, so I decided I needed to move into a home too.”
I knew straight away that I wanted to come here and be with my husband, but was worried because our care needs are different. Luckily, it was possible for me to move into the residential area of the home while Michael lives in the dementia support house.
“Now that we’re settled in, it works really well for us. I pop in to see Michael during the day and we have supper together in the evening, but I can still have my independence too. We also go on days out occasionally, including shopping trips. When I’m out at the shops, I’ll pick up a few little bits for Michael such as the razors he likes or a new aftershave. It’s just like the old days!”
Our RMBI homes offer residential care, nursing care and dementia support. We can also provide sheltered accommodation for people who prefer to live independently, as well as short respite breaks.
To find out more about any of our RMBI homes
including locations, eligibility criteria, advice and information about paying for care, please get in touch:
rmbi.org.uk
0207 596 2400
enquiries@rmbi.org.uk
